Wednesday, August 13, 2014

A Culture of Financial Dependency: My Family is a Part of it and How I'm Starting to Eradicate it


I came from a family of I-put-you-to-school-now-and-once-you-graduate-you-should-help-out . A typical  Filipino family, I should say. And I thought that it was normal. I mean, they helped you pay for school, isn't it right to give back after? 

It is typical, too that once somebody in the family goes abroad, that OFW would become the cash cow, the breadwinner. It's as if the family suddenly hit a jackpot. 

I used to agree with them but now that I've become financially literate, I flushed  those poverty mentality down the drain. Suddenly, I have to rewire my brain. Suddenly, I have to stand my ground and tell them "NO" to all there financial request. Coz I now know that I am not helping them by giving them money, I am hurting them big time.

I put my brother to school and he graduated from college recently but, I didn't tell him to pay me back by helping me financially when I become old- I believed that,by this, I am starting to wipe out the financial dependency in my family. I am helping my two nieces, one is in Grade 6 and one is in first year college but, I didn't  tell them to pay me back as well. I believed that , through this, I am starting to wipe out the financial dependency in my family.

Fellow Filipinos, let's not put someone to school and expect them to help us out after. It feels good to help without expecting anything in return. It feels good to know that we can take care of our old age without relying on somebody  financially coz, we now know how to grow our money through investing.

Let's not make our children or our relatives as our retirement plan. The end of the financial dependency culture ends with this generation. Let's make this happen. Let's do this!




16 comments:

  1. Korek! Korek! Korek!

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  2. Yeah, it's too late to change the past generation so this generation should take up the challenge to stop the "sandwich" mentality (where you're expected to support your own immediate family and parents at the same time)

    You really are such an inspiration :) Good job girl!!

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    1. Yah, the sandwich mentality is so prevalent in Filipino culture. Walang ganyan sa US but we are getting there, right?

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  3. I agree.

    I prefer to help someone finish his studies than shelling out some cash. Helping them with cash every there's a need is a short term help.

    Helping them finish school is a long term help and hopefully they will also pay it forward.

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    1. Yah, the key word here is "hopefully" they'd pay it forward. The thing is, a lot of Filipinos help out because they "expect" something in return and that is a poverty mindset.

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  4. I can related to this post. We should stick to what is right though it would be hard nor an overnight change will happen, we should take action NOW. We can always teach our family how to fish because giving them all the time is enabling them(bible).
    How I help my family is through giving them livelihood and help sending my nieces and nephews to school but I only help 50-70% of their needs, the rest would be theirs.
    Kapit-bisig-doing so, hindi magiging parasite sila. At first they felt I'm strict, greedy and thrifty. Well, I tried to enable them sometimes but it won't help any.
    -I can help kung ano ang makaya- I am not a hero- ang dami kaya nila.ikaw Lang mag isa.

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    1. Ako din, I don't give them 100 percent. I'm just helping my nieces with tuition fees and all. I paid it in full every enrollment, sila na bahala sa baon and all. I don't want to hear any begging na for the rest of the school year, I want them to take responsibility.

      Thanks for dropping by.

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  5. I said "relate" please correct

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    1. If you hadn't point it out, I wouldn't have noticed. My mind just auto corrected it. ;)

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  6. hahaha check lahat

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  7. Thanks for posting this! This is what I've been trying to tell my siblings but they still refuse to understand.

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    1. It's hard to unwire those mindsets that are deeply rooted within our minds and our culture. It's a big quest to "end financial dependency" in our culture, that's why starting it small would be wise. One family at a time, I guess. And in our family, it starts with me.

      Thanks for dropping by. :)

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  8. you should not buy the love of family by paying for nephew and nieces, ask your lazyass sibling to take PERSONAL OWNERSHIP, if siblling does not hv job then help them get a job overseas even if its just a janitor or house maid, NO EXCUSES. You are contradicting yourself by creating parasitic dependence on you of your siblings mistakes, use condom or abortion if cant sustain kids, don't breed like rabbits uusing colonial-masters imposed catholic-religion as an excuse.

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